i guess chivalry isn’t dead?
by zoe
it’s supposed to be, right?
well, regardless, do i have a story for you!
today, while perusing the lara bars and other bars i cannot afford at whole foods, someone behind me went “excuse me?”. since i like to shop alone with headphones in my ears, i removed a bud and turned around to face a young black guy about my age. i said hi. he went on. well, he kind of stumbled on, really. with a question.
“hey, do you mind if i compliment your figure?”
uh, no. who turns down compliments?
“well, i felt like i should just say something instead of staring. but you have a really beautiful figure. i’d say you have what i’d call an hour glass figure. it’s really nice.”
after a few jumbled thank yous and a lot of turning red (because i do that) we proceeded to talk for a few minutes. about beer. about where we grew up. about school. about how he knows my aunt (small world, marin county). then i gave him my number and paid for my apple. will i see him again? who knows! will he text or call? who knows!
not the point.
the point is this: getting that compliment paid to the very thing i’ve struggled so hard with totally made my day. and holy hell — he asked to compliment on my body instead of saying something like, “girl, you’re thick.” (something else i’ve heard).
the other point: next time you see a woman (or a man!) with a body you think is beautiful, why not tell them! some people are not told how beautiful they are on a regular basis. why not remind them of something they might have forgotten?
i cannot tell you the amount of time i’ve seen a woman (and men!) and thought “wow! she’s beautiful!” and wanted to just tell them. i always end up holding back though. i guess because it’s not what we tell people on the reg. but how come? why can’t we remark respectfully on the things we find lovely?
i truly am gaining body confidence. here, in this body so drastically changed. here, in this body of the woman i was maybe meant to be. here, in this beautiful, hourglass body. i can’t really believe it myself.
so tonight i’m taking myself out. it’s dub-step night at a local venue. kind of stoked. especially cause i got my hair cut today!
have you guys ever seen it straight?
have you ever seen my be so narcissistic 
?
namaste
zoe
(p.s: check out my new blog co-created and co-written with my friend victoria! hippie happenings! i posted something rambling today!)
I’ve always wondered if it was appropriate. There’s so many funny social rules we follow without realizing it. This was food for thought.
Hahaha I completely agree! I sure hope he calls you though. If he went out of his way to tell you how beautiful you are… that is just amazing. I need to find myself a chivalrous guy… though the random (mostly creepy old) guys that I meet while walking to the bus provide me with 90% of my confidence. Oh the various honks, nods and whistles. My all time favorite is “hola chica”.
Keep on blogging
Zoe…you are stunning! And good on that bloke for telling you so
xx
I would totally be over the moon if a random stranger complimented me like that.
great story. and you look especially beautiful with your hair like that!
Well, congrats! Sounds like you received the compliment really well (and in answer to your question, many people turn down compliments with little grace)–which shows that you’re in a place that you’re ready to hear that kind of thing. Awesome…
You look so pretty with straight hair!
This is super random, but…did you ever watch Boy Meets World? Well your hair straight looks just like Topenga’s from the show, which I always envied. This is my way of saying that I love your hair.
OHMYGOD HELL YEAH! hah i loooved that show